Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
