I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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