More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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