playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize