You're so nebulous sometimes
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
