Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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