You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I'm really into asian looking animals
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize