dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I need moral support for this bender
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
