pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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