So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
