i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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