He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize