so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize