I just made out with a guy for $7.
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
