Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
