Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
