none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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