I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
