i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
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