what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize