The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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