You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Randomize
