What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I had to cum in my sink.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
