And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Randomize
