oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
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