I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Mom said you looked used
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
