I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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