PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
we're so committed to being not committed
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
