I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Randomize
