He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Randomize
