shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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