i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I could fuck to npr.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
