Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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