The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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