i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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