I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
