white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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