I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
