i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize