I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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