Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize