I hope mine doesn't look like that
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
