My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
