This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize