every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize