A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
