So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
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