she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize