We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
