East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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